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 Free Jokes >Love &
Marriages Jokes >Wedding Jokes |
A man complaining to a friend:
'I had it all - money, a beautiful house, big car, the love of a beautiful
woman ... then ... pow! ... it was all gone!'
'What happened?' asked the friend.
'Ahhhh ... my wife found out ...' |
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Free Jokes >Love &
Marriages Jokes >Wedding Jokes |
As the crowded elevator
descended, Mrs. Silverman became increasingly furious with her husband,
who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous young blonde woman.
As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the blonde suddenly whirled,
slapped Mr. Silverman, and said, 'That will teach you to pinch!'
Bewildered, Mr. Silverman was halfway to the parking lot with his wife
when he choked, 'I . . . I didn't pinch that girl.'
'Of course you didn't,' replied his wife, consolingly.
'I did.' |
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Free Jokes >Love &
Marriages Jokes >Wedding Jokes |
A guy calls up his ex-wife
and, disguising his voice, asks to speak to himself.
'Sorry, he doesn't live here anymore, we're divorced!'
Next day, the guy does the same thing with the same results.
He does this everyday for a week, and finally his ex-wife realizes who it
is that keeps calling. 'Look, Bozo! We're divorced! Finito! End of story!
When are you going to get that through your fat head?'
'Oh, I know! I just can't hear it enough!' |
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Free Jokes >Love &
Marriages Jokes >Wedding Jokes |
A married couple was
celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary.
At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so
long in this day and age.
The husband responded, 'When we were first married we came to an
agreement. I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all
the minor decisions.'
At which point the wife took up the tale, 'And in 60 years of marriage we
have never needed to make a major decision.' |
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Free Jokes >Love &
Marriages Jokes >Wedding Jokes |
The husband was not home at
his usual hour, and the wife was fuming, as the clock ticked later and
later.
Finally, about 3:00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she
stood at the top of the stairs, there was her husband, drunk as a skunk,
trying to navigate the stairs.
'Do you realize what time it is,' she said.
He answered, 'Don't get excited, I'm late because I bought something for
the ouse.'
Immediately her attitude changed, and as she ran down the stairs to meet
him halfway, she said, 'What did you buy for the house, dear?'
His answer was, 'A round of drinks!' |
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