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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
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A married couple rushed to the hospital because
the woman was in labor the doctor asked the couple, "I have invented a new
machine that you might want to try, it takes some of the labor pains away
from the mother and gives it to the father." So the married couple decided
that they would try this. So the doctor hooked the machine up and put it
on 10% of pain switched from the mother to the father and the husband said
"I feel okay turn it up a lot more" so the doctor turned it up to 50% and
the husband said "why don’t you just put it all on me cause I’m not
feeling a thing" but the doctor warned them "this much could kill you if
your not prepared", and the husband replied "I am ready "so the doctor
turned the machine up to 100% but the husband didn’t fell a thing so they
went home happy with a pain free labor, but when they got home the mailman
was dead on the front porch!
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
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Three
men were discussing at a bar about coincidences. The first man said, " my
wife was reading a "tale of two cities" and she gave birth to twins"
"That’s funny", the second man remarked, "my wife was reading 'the three
musketeers' and she gave birth to triplets"
The third man shouted, "Good God, I have to rush home!"
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, " When I left the house, my
wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves"!!!
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
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Four
best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to
their babies. The nurse comes up to the first man and says,
"Congratulations, you got twins." The man said "How strange, I'm the
manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse comes up to the second
man and says, "Congratulations, you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm,
strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally, the nurse
comes up to the third man and says
"Congratulations, you got twins x2." Man is happy and says, "Ironic, I
work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they see
their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his
head on the wall. They asked him what's wrong and he answered, "What's
wrong? I work for 7up"!
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
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We
spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to
walk and talk, and the next Twenty-four years telling them to sit down and
shut up! |
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
A man who's
wife was pregnant couldn't bear to be in the delivery room at the time of
the birth.
So he thought he'd ring up later to see if it had come yet.
He rang up and the nurse said "it's a girl but theres another one on the
way"
he rang again later and the nurse said "it's another girl but there's
another coming"
he rang once more and the nurse said " it's a boy but there's another
coming"
He couldn't stand it any more so he went to the pub and got drunk.
An hour later he was really nervous. He was dialling the hospital, hands
shaking, and accidently dialled the sports line. he asked " how many did
we get mate" the person said "198 all out.... and the last one was a duck" |
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