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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
A
watermelon farmer was determined to scare off the local kids who went into
his watermelon patch every night to eat their fill. After some thought, he
made a sign that read, 'WARNING! ONE OF THESE WATERMELONS HAS BEEN
INJECTED WITH CYANIDE!'
He smiled smugly as he watched the kids run off the next night without
eating any of his melons. A week later, the farmer was surveying his
field. To his satisfaction, no watermelons were missing, but a sign next
to his read, 'NOW THERE ARE TWO!' |
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
A
physician was taking her 4-year-old daughter to preschool. The little girl
picked up the stethoscope, which the doctor had left on the car seat, and
began playing with it.
'Be still, my heart,' thought the doctor. 'My daughter wants to follow in
my footsteps!'
Then the child spoke into the instrument, 'Welcome to McDonald's. May I
take your order?' |
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
Realizing at the last minute that it was his father's birthday, a teenage
boy rushed to the corner store to grab a card. He quickly found a
son-to-father card, but neglected to read it carefully.
Later when his father opened his gifts, he was surprised to read aloud,
'Happy birthday to a wonderful Dad. Now that I'm a father too . . .' |
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
A boy
and his Father went to a shopping mall. They were amazed by two shiny,
silver walls that could move apart and back together again.
The boy asked his Father, 'What is that Father?'
The Father responded, 'Son, I have never seen anything like that in my
life, I don't know what it is.'
While the boy and his Father were watching, an elderly woman slowly walked
up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady
walked between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and
his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls
light up.
They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction. The
walls opened up again and a gorgeous woman stepped out.
The Father said to his son, 'Go get your Mother'. |
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Free Jokes- Children Jokes >Kids Jokes >Child Jokes |
A
young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was
a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said to
him, 'I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your
bible more, and get your hair cut, then we will talk about it.'
A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if they could
discuss his use of the car. His father said, 'Son, I'm real proud of you.
You have brought your grades up, you've studied your bible diligently, but
you didn't get a hair cut!'
The young man waited a moment and replied, 'You know dad, I've been
thinking about that. You know Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair,
Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair.' His father replied,
'Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went!' |
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